Thursday, November 06, 2003
Ever experience that mild depression/despair that overtakes your joy from time to time... well, here's what to do - Rick's Top Ten Ways To Get Over "Da Funk":
(10) Slap a mime - can't hurt, might be fun
(9) Ben & Jerry's - thousands of single women can't be wrong
(8) Stab a pen in your leg - everything else uphill from there
(7) Read a book to a child - War & Peace works for me
(6) Stand on your head and cluck like a chicken - can't hurt, might be fun
(5) Watch Jerry Springer with the sound muted, with "Don't Worry, Be Happy" blasting from the stereo
(4) Call telemarketing firms, asking if they've got time to help with a survey
(3) Slap a mime again - felt good at #10, didn't it?
(2) Stop your car in the main intersection of town and get out, sit on the hood, and wave at all of your new friends
... and the number one way to get over "da funk"":
(1) pray, asking God for extra fruitiness - joy is a fruit!