Wednesday, January 21, 2004
I can quote all kinds of statistics about how the family is falling apart, how it's taking a hit from enemy forces trying to destroy its sanctity, how Britney Spears has no idea how belittling her pseudo-marriage was to the world-at-large. But when something happens to a friend... well, it's personal.
A friend wrote yesterday to say that his wife had left him. Three kids, ministry, thirteen years - and walking out the door. Weekend after Christmas, building since April, but a problem going on much much longer. I haven't been close to this friend in a long time - but we've got history, I guess, buddies since high school. This is the first of our friends to go this direction, so in the sense we've been lucky. But... dang.
I told my wife about it. She's "still reeling" this morning, having that same dropjaw reaction that I did. I told her I loved her. She said, "I know." There's just something so devastating about a family being thrown aside. I've got cousins who've gotten divorced, remarried, split custody - but we haven't been real close to any of them. This one just hurts by its proximity.
I want to blame someone. But the more I think, the more I know that's not going to help. She needs to grow up, get with the program, smell the roses and the morning coffee - but there's not much room for grace in the midst of the junk that's been building up. I pray for forgiveness, for mercy, and for conviction to cut to and through the bones and the hardness of heart - but I leave that to God's hand. I don't even know them that well anymore - who am I to stand in judgment over them. I have no idea... but I want to see restoration so much it hurts.